The Ballad of Campbell's Homestyle Chicken Noodle
I am sick with a damn virus
I haven't been around. I've been working a lot, and I don't have Internet at home. Unless I patch in through my phone or leech off a neighbour... so... we'll see.
Today was my second sick day ever.
Yes.
I hate being sick so much.
But there's one thing I love.
---
The Ballad of Campbell's Homestyle Chicken Noodle
So I settled in Frisco in the fall of Oh-Nine
Not a cloud in sight; thought the world was mine.
Then an elderly man put his hand out for change
When I said I had none then he talked real strange
"May a thousand plagues from the Dine god
Strike you down like a dog, you worthless fraud!".
(At the time I laughed off the old Indian's curse
I work in the SoMa--how could it get worse?)
But I started to notice at a quarter of four
Some minor sniffling, and my throat was sore.
So I stopped at the store feeling alright still;
But why should I chance it? I know the drill:
Lots of water, lots of rest;
Lots of Vicks to put on your chest
(Now I've always thought it was rather gross
But apparently I'm more squeamish than most)
A spot of ice cream; some honey, some tea
Some zinc, some Advil and some vitamin C.
Or dispense with it all in one fell swoop
In exchange for some Campbell's Chicken Soup.
(Worth its weight in solid gold
As a one-two punch for the common cold)
You just turn on the burner; find a big pot
As you wouldn't think it but it makes a whole lot.
Then it's one part soup and one part water;
Wait a few minutes 'til it starts to get hotter.
Now turn off the heat and take off the pan
And praise that miraculous little can
(Or convenient cup, for all you knaves
Who can do your cooking with microwaves)
Good for colds, good for the flu
Good for Navajo curses too.
But the lesson here--not to be obscene--
Is to get the goddamned flu vaccine.
And that's my own plan--I'm swearing it here--
If I'm still in Frisco by the fall of next year.
Today was my second sick day ever.
Yes.
I hate being sick so much.
But there's one thing I love.
---
The Ballad of Campbell's Homestyle Chicken Noodle
So I settled in Frisco in the fall of Oh-Nine
Not a cloud in sight; thought the world was mine.
Then an elderly man put his hand out for change
When I said I had none then he talked real strange
"May a thousand plagues from the Dine god
Strike you down like a dog, you worthless fraud!".
(At the time I laughed off the old Indian's curse
I work in the SoMa--how could it get worse?)
But I started to notice at a quarter of four
Some minor sniffling, and my throat was sore.
So I stopped at the store feeling alright still;
But why should I chance it? I know the drill:
Lots of water, lots of rest;
Lots of Vicks to put on your chest
(Now I've always thought it was rather gross
But apparently I'm more squeamish than most)
A spot of ice cream; some honey, some tea
Some zinc, some Advil and some vitamin C.
Or dispense with it all in one fell swoop
In exchange for some Campbell's Chicken Soup.
(Worth its weight in solid gold
As a one-two punch for the common cold)
You just turn on the burner; find a big pot
As you wouldn't think it but it makes a whole lot.
Then it's one part soup and one part water;
Wait a few minutes 'til it starts to get hotter.
Now turn off the heat and take off the pan
And praise that miraculous little can
(Or convenient cup, for all you knaves
Who can do your cooking with microwaves)
Good for colds, good for the flu
Good for Navajo curses too.
But the lesson here--not to be obscene--
Is to get the goddamned flu vaccine.
And that's my own plan--I'm swearing it here--
If I'm still in Frisco by the fall of next year.
| Vulpecula 9.11.2009 - 11h36 |
*coughs and wheezes* Preach on brother. Though my admiration for your tune here is significantly tempered by the fact that you are the source of my infection. As for the flu vaccine, it didn't save me. It only works when people don't give you the version of the plague whose vaccine is not readily available yet. >:[ |
| Vulpecula 9.11.2009 - 11h37 |
And your format tag instructions don't warn that astrixes can end up being magically turned into bullet points with indentations. |
| Comrade Alex 10.11.2009 - 8h25 |
Oh. Yeah, that is a thing that can happen, in your asterisk scenarios. It should be fixed now. As a reminder, for basic text formatting, you can: • Use [i]text[/i] for italics • Use [b]text[/b] for bold • Use [ind]text[/ind] to indent • Use *, **, or *** to create bulleted lists. Presuming this works XD +c"i has a plague. itz contagious"a |