Diary of an Expat, Part 72
easyJet
This is sort of about being an expatriate, but mostly about traveling. So let me tell you a brief story, where the moral is encapsulated right in the story itself:

Once upon a time, fuck easyJet.

easyJet, for those of you who are blessedly unfamiliar with it, is a low-cost airline for people who think that the TSA treats air travelers with just a little too much dignity. It is just a cut above Ryanair, which means that it is the airline for people who think that they are better than Ryanair and are mistaken.

When you fly easyJet, you get to go to the Other Airport. Not the one that's convenient to you, but the one that's inconveniently far away from everything you care about. Then you get to stand in a series of very long lines. On the plus side, if you pay some euros, you do now get to select your seat in advance.

In exchange, you get to pay fifty euros less than you would on a real airline, minus whatever it costs to get to the airport in the middle of nowhere and the bourbon it takes to maintain your sanity. Also the airplane and everything in it is covered with ads. I don't exactly know why this is, since the only unifying characteristic of easyJet passengers is that they are such ridiculous cheapskates that they are willing to make air travel even more dehumanizing for a few bucks.

... On second thought, familiarity with being debased by massive corporations who want you to think you're an informed consumer by condescending to you may make the kind of people who travel easyJet particularly susceptible to the gloss of shiny advertising? I don't know.

Anyway. I should note that I had a decent flight, in the sense that nobody crashed and my luggage was not folded, spindled, or mutilated. But it's the principle of the thing. It's the principle of paying for an extra bag and discovering that they mean you get two bags to fill with 20 kg, instead of one, so your second 20kg bag sets you back three hundred euro. It's the principle of realizing that air travel is ridiculously uncomfortable, and easyJet represents some of the lowest common denominator of that race to the bottom.

So, I will be voting with my wallet from here on out because while I get the argument ("hey man that €25 that you save is €25 you have to spend hanging out in Ibiza") the reality, for me, is that I am not willing to spend any more time being treated like cattle and/or cordwood than airlining already entails.

But anyway I'm back from Spain now. Mobile World Congress was a blast. Utterly, utterly exhausting, but a complete blast. Here is some of us Nokia people doing 'jenkka', a traditional Finnish dance. I am not in that (or I am, but I'm up on the balcony), but that is a lot of what my company is like. Very fun.

But I am completely exhausted, so I am going to call it an early night. Fortunately the weather in Barcelona was not all that great, and the weather in Berlin is nice fall weather, so it's very good to be back Home in Deutschland.

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